Faith that will Conquer the World!

One day in 1939, George Bernard Dantzig, a doctoral candidate at the University of California, Berkeley, arrived late for a graduate-level statistics class and found two problems written on the board. Not knowing they were examples of unsolved statistics problems, he mistook them for part of a homework assignment, jotted them down, and solved them.

Later, when Dantzig was asked about how he solved them, he replied, “If I had known that the problems were not homework, but were in fact two famous unsolved problems in statistics, I probably would not have thought positively, would have become discouraged, and would never have solved them.”

The Bible is filled with stories of people who did great things for God simply because they believed that with God’s power they could. And we have other stories showing what happens when you don’t believe in God’s power. I want to point out two of those stories. The first is about Jesus’ disciples. They were given the power to heal and to cast out demons. But there was a boy who was possessed by a demon. Some translations say he had epilepsy. But the disciples couldn’t heal him. Jesus casts out the demon and then rebukes his disciples telling them that they lacked faith. They were given the power but doubted that they could in fact do it. The second story is about Peter. Jesus walks on the water to a boat that Peter and the other disciples are on. Jesus calls out to Peter to get out of the boat and walk out to him. Peter follows Jesus orders and walks on the water. But then, he notices that he’s doing something impossible and realizing that it’s impossible, begins to sink. Jesus asks him later, “Why did you doubt?” Peter was doing the impossible and still doubted while he was proving it could be done.

How many of us do the same thing? We look at something that needs to be done and we fail because we know it’s impossible. Or we say, “I can’t do that.” Or “others are better at that than me, so I won’t do it.” We make excuse after excuse because we fear failure, or worse yet, “what will other people think?” Or “that’s impossible, so why bother trying?” Did you know that some things ARE actually impossible, <pause> until someone does them. Sometimes there are people who are so stupid that they believe they can do something everyone else knows is impossible. And in there stupidity, they actually do it.

I’m going to talk about a few concepts that I sometimes think Christians have intellectualized away. As if we have become so “enlightened” that we don’t believe them because they don’t make sense to us anymore. The laws of the universe don’t conform to these concepts, so there is no way it is possible. But I contend that they remain true no matter how we might want to dismiss them.

One idea is the miracles reported in the Bible. We try to find “natural” explanations for how they could have happened. For example, the raising of Lazarus from the dead. Lazarus died and his family buries him. 3 days later, Jesus arrives, opens his tomb, and calls for him to come out. Lazarus comes out and Jesus says, “take his grave clothes off” Many people today believe that Lazarus was not in fact dead, but had fallen into a coma-like state that often appeared like death. As a matter of fact, in more modern times, Edgar Allen Poe feared being buried alive because of falling into such a state. He took many precautions to make arrangements for everyone to be sure he was dead before anyone was allowed to bury him. But why do modern day Christians see raising Lazarus as impossible? One reason is that it defies the laws of nature. People cannot come back to life once they are dead. We KNOW that. But why is it impossible for God?

That’s just one example. We can look at many other examples. Jonah in the belly of a fish defies all understanding. It must just be a metaphor because that can’t happen. The Great Flood, just another story to boost the ratings. Virgin birth, try to teach THAT in biology class. The list goes on and on.

So let me ask this, is God confined by the laws of nature? Who do you think wrote the laws of nature? I’m thinking it was the God who brought nature into existence. If we believe God created the universe, why do we think the God who created life, cannot restore it? This is one of those “being too enlightened to believe” moments I’m talking about. My personal belief is that God created the universe. It may have been in 6 days, just 6000 years ago. It may have been through the Big Bang. To me, it doesn’t matter. You can pick your favorite theory. To me it doesn’t matter HOW it was done, all that matters is that I know it was GOD who did it. God’s method doesn’t matter to me. In our enlightenment, we have made science and religion mutually exclusive. You either believe in what science tells us, or you believe in what religion tells us. For me, I believe there is a third option. I believe that God created and controls what happens and science will help us understand how all that works. Science does NOT have to be an enemy of religion, it can be an ally. My hope is that science will one day explain the universe so clearly that it will be impossible to deny that it was created by intelligent design, that it didn’t “just happen” by random accidents.

This is the faith that the writer of Hebrews talks about when he says, “faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.” We say that we believe in God, and that Jesus is the Son of God, but we have become a society of “doubting Thomas’s.” Thomas would not believe that Jesus was raised from the dead until he saw it with his own eyes. We take a critical view of Thomas for his unbelief, but how are we any different? We cannot believe in things we can’t prove. We elevate science to a status where our faith should be. For many of us, our faith relies on science for validation. We won’t believe it, if it can’t be proven. And that includes God working in our lives. Maybe we WANT science to prove it wasn’t God because God’s power is scary to us. We can only manage what we can understand. So if it goes beyond our understanding, we can’t control it. If we can’t control God, what if He tells me to do something I don’t want to do? I might actually have to do it. And it’s scary.

So the faith I’ve been talking about so far has really been more of a “passive” faith, just believing that God can do things beyond our understanding. But I want to talk more about an “active” faith, a faith that causes us to do things that are way outside our comfort zone, a faith that moves us to action when we would prefer to do something else, or be somewhere else, a faith that can change the course of history.

Last week, I was at the Manassas Church of the Brethren. I got to hear Chris Bowman’s sermon on faith, based on Hebrews chapter 11. This chapter talks about the faith of Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham, Moses, and on and on. All these people had faith and God brought about these extraordinary results in their lives. But what was so good about his sermon, was when he got to verse 35. He mentioned that we often gloss over that part because we want to be on the first list. The list of all these great people who had faith in God and great things came from it. But in verse 35, the writer switches gears and says, “others”, others who were faithful, but their lives went a different route. Happily ever after wasn’t the outcome for them. This is how the last portion of Hebrews 11 reads:

By faith the people passed through the Red Sea as if it were dry land, but when the Egyptians attempted to do so they were drowned. By faith the walls of Jericho fell after they had been encircled for seven days. By faith Rahab the prostitute did not perish with those who were disobedient, because she had received the spies in peace. And what more should I say? For time would fail me to tell of Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, of David and Samuel and the prophets— who through faith conquered kingdoms, administered justice, obtained promises, shut the mouths of lions, quenched raging fire, escaped the edge of the sword, won strength out of weakness, became mighty in war, put foreign armies to flight. Women received their dead by resurrection.

So far all about great faith and the great results for holding fast to it. And now we read this:

OTHERS were tortured, refusing to accept release, in order to obtain a better resurrection. Others suffered mocking and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. They were stoned to death, they were sawn in two, they were killed by the sword; they went about in skins of sheep and goats, destitute, persecuted, tormented— of whom the world was not worthy. They wandered in deserts and mountains, and in caves and holes in the ground. Yet all these, though they were commended for their faith, did not receive what was promised, since God had provided something better so that they would not, apart from us, be made perfect.

These people became martyrs for their faith. They did not receive a glorious parade to celebrate their faithful service and mark how God brought them through with flying colors. Their faith did bring them special blessings when they got to heaven, but it was not received here on Earth.

Peter is a good example of a good outcome. He was thrown into prison and the other disciples prayed and prayed and God sent an angel and he was released. How about John the Baptist? He was thrown into prison and his disciples prayed and prayed and he was beheaded. Not the outcome we like to think about.

We don’t know what the outcome for our faith might be. But the question is, are we willing to act on it no matter how serious the result may be?

The scriptures that Sarah read for us today might seem to be an odd mix of ideas to go together. The first scripture pretty much tells us that if we ask God to do anything for us and we have full faith that He will do it, then we can count it as done. He says, “Whatever you ask for in prayer, with faith, you will receive.” It seems very clear. Ask for it, believe you’ll get it, and it’s yours. Can’t be much plainer, can it?

The second scripture says that if we love God, we will obey his commandments. Again a very plain truth, if you love God, you show it by obeying His commands for your life.

I want to throw a third scripture into the mix. Matthew 7:11, If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask him!

So like the first, all we have to do is ask, and we will receive because God loves us.

So let me ask, what do you want God to give you?

Now, before we start thinking of God as our Genie in the Lamp, here’s where a little logic needs to be applied. We love God, so we do what we’re told. God loves us, so we get what we ask for.

First question, what does God tell us to do?

Well, we’re told to not covet what other people have.

We’re told to not love money.

We’re told not to rely on wealth for security.

We’re told to rely completely on God for our daily needs.

So what was it you wanted to ask God to give you?


How about this:

Someone we love is sick, maybe dying. Obviously we want them to be healed. So what do we ask God to do? We ask for healing, right? Why is that? Is it because we don’t want to lose them? Meaning it’s actually for us? Or they are suffering, so we want that to stop, but we don’t want death to be the method of stopping the suffering. Why?

As human beings, we ask God for something, but we also lay out our agenda of acceptable ways God to do that. We might have great faith that God is going to carry out the agenda as we prescribed it. But what if it doesn’t go that way? Do we stop having faith? What was our faith in anyway? Was it in God to do the right thing, or was it in our agenda for what we find acceptable.

When Jesus was praying in the garden about his death, he told God, “I’m not liking this plan you got going for me. Let’s talk about changing it up.” But as much as he didn’t want the plan to end in suffering and death, he still submitted and said, “not MY will, but YOUR’S be done.” His faith in God to do the right thing, overrode his own desires. He had the ability to change the plan, but he chose to follow God’s plan, not his own.

Jesus is the example of faith in action that we need to follow. I ask in faith for something, but I get aligned with God’s will. If I ask for selfish things, I am not aligned with God. I ask with the wrong motives. Asking in faith is not just asking and believing that I will get it. It’s about asking and having faith that God will give me what I need, not just what I want.

Faith is not for God. Faith is for us. Faith should be transforming us into the people of God. It’s our faith that allows us to have an anchor to get through some of the worst times in our lives. It allows us to weather storms that seemingly beat us up, but in the end, only make us stronger, provided we hang on to our faith. Faith allows us to be leaders, and not followers. If we follow the trends of the world, we can’t change the world, because we are part of the world. If we step out and lead with our faith in hand, we’re going to stand out and be different. We may not be popular at the time, but we leave an imprint on those who can’t figure out why we don’t just go with the flow. They go with the flow and feel safe, but often unfulfilled. When their longing for fulfillment grows, they will remember those that stood out and pick up where we left off. The seeds of faith we plant today, will one day grow. We don’t know where or when, but we can be sure that they will grow.

I’d like to close with a real life example of transforming faith. I know a couple who had a young daughter that developed an incurable illness. Death was certain. The couple prayed, their family prayed, their friends prayed, their church prayed. Everyone was praying for the healing of this little girl. And not long after that, she died. Asking God for healing, in faith, did not heal this little girl. But the change in the couple, the change in their family, the change in their friends, the change in their church was nothing short of a miracle. Their faith was stronger, their relationships were tighter, everything about them grew to whole new level. Of course they mourned and to this day fight back tears for their loss, but the power of God through their faith has made them new creations. They are out there fighting for children who suffer with diseases that take their lives too soon. They have opened an orphanage in a third world country for children who are otherwise forgotten. The world is changing because of their faith. They are on a crusade to help others who have to deal with the loss of children.

THAT is faith that changes the world!

The "Beer and Hymns" Controversy - My Thoughts

https://www.christianheadlines.com/blog/oklahoma-church-organizes-beer-and-hymns-sunday-with-three-beer-limit.html

The above article is all about a Tulsa church trying to get people to come to church. They are using a “Beer and Hymns” theme to do it. I often read the comments that people post following the articles I read. As I expected, this idea was slammed by Christians as “blasphemous” and “inviting the devil into the church”, etc. On the surface I agree with them whole-heartedly, but is there something going on here that we aren’t seeing? Is this church addressing an issue that other churches, while aware of the same issue, are ignoring?

I think there's a couple ways to look at this. The first question in my mind as I read this article was "why resort to gimmicks to get people into church?" But upon further consideration, I asked myself, "WHY are people not going to church?" I was reminded of an experience I had in my younger days. I worked with a bunch of guys who refused to invite me to things (parties, home celebrations, etc) because they would drink at those functions. I was the "religious" guy. I never hid my faith, so they didn't want me there. They assumed I considered myself to be “too good for them” or would condemn them for their behavior. Somehow, they “knew” I didn’t fit in. Maybe I was seen as a reminder that they lived a “sinful” life. I’m not 100% sure why I was so unpopular, but I was. I was the company "outcast" because of my faith. But one day, maybe by accident, I got invited to go to the bar after work. Everyone assumed I would refuse, but to their surprise, I accepted. I don't drink, but not because of my faith. I grew up around alcoholism and was prone to it myself. I realized this early on and I avoid alcohol (for myself) because I am not going down that road. I have no problem with other people drinking “in moderation”. So, on this occasion, I drank Coke all night, while they drank beer. They harassed me for not drinking, and even the waitress made a joke about me “wetting the bed” because I was drinking just Coke. To their surprise, I laughed with them, and even made jokes about it too. When it started getting a little later into the evening, I knew I could not be the first to leave because "it was expected" based on their assumptions about religious people. So I stayed until the end of the night. I was actually in the group last to leave the bar, at closing time. The next day I was suddenly accepted into the group because I was now seen as a "regular" guy. I never compromised my beliefs that evening. I also never spoke of the evils of drinking, or condemn them for anything they did, or make any demands. I accepted my coworkers as my equals and friends. As I came to find out later, the guys expected me to be so uncomfortable that I would leave on my own and accept my role as the “outcast”. Their jokes were to intimidate me and make me want to leave. What they didn’t know, or expect, is that I entered THEIR world. And the strangest outcome of all, they started having conversations with me about my faith and God. I could be approached because I didn't shun them for their lifestyle. I allowed them to be them, and accepted them as they were. There was no expectations or disappointment in who they were, just honest and complete acceptance.

I believe many people do not attend church because too many Christians are no longer "relevant" to real life. We have created rules and regulations that keep others out of the church. "Drinking alcohol is wrong", so if you do that, you cannot be part of our community. Well, whether you believe drinking is wrong or not, by putting that out there, anyone who drinks is not going to associate with you, or WANT to be part of your community. The general population considers drinking to be fun, and Christians are not. Christians are constantly throwing a wet blanket on their fun. You may not agree, but that is our reputation in the mainstream.

So I like to think in these terms, the idea is to get into THEIR world first. That doesn’t mean you have to compromise your beliefs and do what they do, but you have to stop condemning others for how they live, stop pointing out all their faults, or telling them the “proper” way to behave. Just sit with those who need God, and listen, ask questions, just be sincere. Care about them, provide for their needs. Just let your light show them a better way, BY EXAMPLE. The discussions will come later. Who's going to come to Jesus if we say, "to come to Jesus, you can't drink, you can't smoke, you can't...whatever"? They are going to keep their distance because you don't allow them to see Jesus in you because of all the rules and regulations that you have set up to keep them away. All they can see are the rules and regulations, not the love we have because of Jesus. Yes, the hope is that once they come to Jesus, they will straighten out whatever sinful leanings they may have, but that is for God to work out with them.

I have met many Christians who say things like, "I wouldn't be caught dead in a bar, or in a <insert your place where the non-saved hang out>" Well, if you won't go there, how will those who need Jesus ever meet him? We are called to be "in the world, but not 'of' it." But everyone is so worried about "doing the right thing" that they avoid going "into the world" out of fear that they might "appear" to be "of the world", or they are concerned that they might be seen by other Christians and their intentions “misinterpreted". Jesus was not afraid to get his hands dirty to be with "sinners". Avoiding the evils of the world only removes us from those who need to see our holiness. Hiding inside the church prevents the unsaved from ever seeing God because we hide our light inside it, where they will not go on their own. We need to go out into the world to find those who need God, because they will not be coming to us.

In my story of going to the bar, some Christian friends condemned me for being in such a place. But guess what, the guys I worked with never had a serious discussion about God before, because they won't go into a church where the discussions are happening. But they WILL go into a bar, and because I was there with them, they finally had that discussion. Whether or not they accepted Christ is immaterial. The important piece is that they got to meet one of His disciples and hear His message. They didn't go to church to hear it. They heard it in THEIR environment, not mine.

So let’s not be so quick to judge this church who is trying “Beer and Hymns”. It may very well be the wrong approach, but it IS an approach. How many of us attend churches that have no real evangelism "effort"? How many churches are waning in number because no one new is coming in? Nearly every denomination is losing numbers. THAT cannot be denied. But how many churches have willing members who are going out into the world to meet people that need God? And then boldly show God’s love to them, without condemnation, but with pure acceptance? Are we willing to talk to strangers about the good news of Jesus? On the other hand, many churches work very hard at being a “welcoming” church. By the way, that is a very important quality, but how many churches have all that many visitors coming in the doors? And are the visitors already believers? Only those seeking a church will find one. Our mission is to MAKE disciples, not recruit them from other congregations. If we concentrate on only those who enter our doors, we may become very good at it, but those who NEED Jesus are not going to come to our churches. If the lost are seeking for God, and knew the church is the place to find Him, then our numbers would not be falling. WE have to go out and FIND the lost, show them the Way, and accept them into our community. Accepting those who are not just like us, can be very difficult, but think about it, Jesus went to the outcasts, not the religious folks. He said, “Only the sick need a doctor, not the healthy”. So let’s stop trying to grow by recruiting from other churches and start recruiting those who don’t know God, by letting them see God in you. If that means going to a bar, then perhaps being in church, at the time you should be in the bar, means you are spending your time in the wrong place.

As an added bonus, a friend of mine over at Godvine sent me this video after reading my thoughts in this article:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6rdtAQ31Xbo

Advice to Kids in School

None of the following writing is my own. I am only putting it out there because it is so good. I very much enjoyed the writing of this author, and the wisdom he espouses. Currently, this list is circulating on Facebook as a meme attributing the wisdom to Bill Gates. Only rule # 11 actually sounds like something Bill Gates would say. Everything else goes against his general philosophy based on my observation of his speeches and actions. So here is the list including some additional rules and additional verbiage on each rule:

This list is actually the work of Charles J. Sykes, author of the 1996 book Dumbing Down Our Kids: Why American Children Feel Good About Themselves But Can't Read, Write, Or Add. 

Rule No. 1:   Life is not fair. Get used to it. The average teen-ager uses the phrase "It's not fair" 8.6 times a day. You got it from your parents, who said it so often you decided they must be the most idealistic generation ever. When they started hearing it from their own kids, they realized Rule No. 1.

Rule No. 2:   The real world won't care as much about your self-esteem as much as your school does. It'll expect you to accomplish something before you feel good about yourself. This may come as a shock. Usually, when inflated self-esteem meets reality, kids complain that it's not fair. (See Rule No. 1)

Rule No. 3:   Sorry, you won't make $40,000 a year right out of high school. And you won't be a vice president or have a car phone either. You may even have to wear a uniform that doesn't have a Gap label.

Rule No. 4:   If you think your teacher is tough, wait 'til you get a boss. He doesn't have tenure, so he tends to be a bit edgier. When you screw up, he's not going to ask you how you feel about it.

Rule No. 5:   Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping. They called it opportunity. They weren't embarrassed making minimum wage either. They would have been embarrassed to sit around talking about Kurt Cobain all weekend.

Rule No. 6:   It's not your parents' fault. If you screw up, you are responsible. This is the flip side of "It's my life," and "You're not the boss of me," and other eloquent proclamations of your generation. When you turn 18, it's on your dime. Don't whine about it, or you'll sound like a baby boomer.

Rule No. 7:   Before you were born your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way paying your bills, cleaning up your room and listening to you tell them how idealistic you are. And by the way, before you save the rain forest from the blood-sucking parasites of your parents' generation, try delousing the closet in your bedroom.

Rule No. 8:   Your school may have done away with winners and losers. Life hasn't. In some schools, they'll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. Failing grades have been abolished and class valedictorians scrapped, lest anyone's feelings be hurt. Effort is as important as results. This, of course, bears not the slightest resemblance to anything in real life. (See Rule No. 1, Rule No. 2 and Rule No. 4.)

Rule No. 9:   Life is not divided into semesters, and you don't get summers off. Not even Easter break. They expect you to show up every day. For eight hours. And you don't get a new life every 10 weeks. It just goes on and on. While we're at it, very few jobs are interested in fostering your self-expression or helping you find yourself. Fewer still lead to self-realization. (See Rule No. 1 and Rule No. 2.)

Rule No. 10:   Television is not real life. Your life is not a sitcom. Your problems will not all be solved in 30 minutes, minus time for commercials. In real life, people actually have to leave the coffee shop to go to jobs. Your friends will not be as perky or pliable as Jennifer Aniston.

Rule No. 11:   Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.
 

Rule No. 12:   Smoking does not make you look cool. It makes you look moronic. Next time you're out cruising, watch an 11-year-old with a butt in his mouth. That's what you look like to anyone over 20. Ditto for "expressing yourself" with purple hair and/or pierced body parts.

Rule No. 13:   You are not immortal. (See Rule No. 12.) If you are under the impression that living fast, dying young and leaving a beautiful corpse is romantic, you obviously haven't seen one of your peers at room temperature lately.

Rule No. 14:   Enjoy this while you can. Sure parents are a pain, school's a bother, and life is depressing. But someday you'll realize how wonderful it was to be a kid. Maybe you should start now. You're welcome.

My Sermon from April 27, 2014

This entry is not my view on a current event.

I was asked to fill in for our pastor for the week following Easter. I love to preach, so of course I accepted. I struggled with a topic for weeks and came up with nothing. About a week before it was due, a chain of events lead me to find the scriptures I believe God wanted me to preach on. So here's the sermon I delivered that day. It is based on Genesis 1:26-27,5:1 and Romans 8:28-39.

How many of you have a son or daughter, or maybe a parent that looks like you? People look at you and say, “there’s no doubt who’s child you are.”

If you took the baby pictures of my grandfather, my father, myself, and my daughter at age 3 months, you could not tell which picture was me other than by the bad color of the photograph. All 4 of us look like the exact same person. Now, my grandfather’s picture is brown, my father’s is black and white, mine is in color, but faded and not very realistic color from the 1960s, and my daughter’s looks more life-like. But the point is, we all look exactly alike. We could be the same person. The way we each look was determined by our genetic make-up and since we all share the same genetic traits, being in the same family, we look just like each other.

In the Genesis passages that Shirley read for us this morning, the Bible tells us: “God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.” So I ask, “What does being created in the IMAGE of God mean to you?” Does it mean we look like God? Does it mean we act like God? What thoughts are provoked in your mind when you think about being created in the image of God? When did you last think about this idea? HAVE you ever thought about this idea?

I have been in churches and heard preachers say things like, “we are nothing but lowly sinners. We are like worms in the sight of the Lord.” Paul even tells us in Romans 3, “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” So if we are such lowly creatures and this idea is true, what hope is there for us? We bought ourselves a one way ticket to fire and brimstone and that flight ain’t coming back!

Today, I want start off by challenging this idea. I want us to consider our value as human beings. Does God value us, or are we in fact lowly and worthless? Yes, we are sinners. No doubt about it. I’m not even going to try to argue on that. But what does “being created in God’s image have to do with anything?”

Well, let’s look at that phrase. Being created in the “image” or “likeness” of God means in the simplest terms, that we were made to resemble God. Think about that for a second, “WE RESEMBLE GOD.”

So in what way do we resemble God? In John’s gospel, he tells us that “God is spirit.” And when God created man, first he formed his body from the dust of the ground. Then He breathed into him, the “breath of life.” This “breath of life” was God’s spirit. God gave human beings a piece of His own spirit in order for us to become living beings. Think about that. Part of God’s spirit is inside of us. So if our spirit is part of God’s spirit, we are like God. We have the attributes of God as part of our being. God is love. So we are love. God offers grace. So we offer grace. We don’t do it because that’s what we are supposed to do, we do it because that is part of our nature. If you do it out of obligation or a sense of duty, you are denying what God planned for you, and who God created you to be.

I want to talk a little about another aspect of being like God. This one is near and dear to my heart.

First, let’s take a poll. By a show of hands, who is afraid of something? (All hands went up).

Let me ask, "what exactly are the things you afraid of? "

Some of us could make a huge list, right? But let me get real specific.

Let’s take another poll. By a show of hands, who here is afraid of what other people think of you?

If you notice, my hand is up. Because, that’s a really big one for me. I’m afraid that if I tell someone I’m a Christian they might not like me. Or if I invite someone to come to church, I might say the wrong thing and turn them off to church. Or I’m afraid that if they do come to church, someone who’s having a bad day will talk to them and give a bad impression of our church, and that will reflect badly on all of us. Maybe, if I talk about my faith at work, someone will stop talking to me because they have a different belief? Or worse yet, being from the Church of the Brethren, I might offend someone! We can’t have that!

You can see how ridiculous this thinking can get. It sounds like an exaggeration, but many people have those exact thoughts. I know I do. I have always worried about what people think of me. It was part of my childhood. I was constantly told, “If you do this or that, what will people think?” I was taught very early to be concerned with what people thought of me. I also learned that if I didn’t behave or got out of line, the concern was “how does that reflect on my parents?” Anyone with kids ever worry about that? You’re real concern is not “what do people think about them”, but “what do they think about me?”

So how do we handle this fear? Well, for me, it’s very simple. I don’t talk about my faith until I am sure that it’s safe to do so. If my co-worker says, “do you go to church?” WOW! Pressure is off, and I can talk all day long about how much I love my church and my faith and about our ministries and how I am active in this, that or the other thing. You can’t shut me up once the coast is clear. But is that what we are called to be?

The Apostle Paul, writing to a young man named Timothy said this, “God did not give us a spirit of fear, but rather a spirit of power and of love and of self-discipline.”

Earlier, I was exploring the origin of the human spirit. Our human spirit was put in us by God, and it was a piece of God’s own spirit. He breathed that spirit into our bodies and put life into us. Paul says that it is a spirit of power and love and self-discipline. He says, “it is NOT a spirit of fear.” And what did I express happens when I want to share my faith with others? FEAR! Every thought I have is based in FEAR! God didn’t give me a spirit of fear. So why am I so afraid? I was taught from birth to deny my true nature. My true nature is one of power and love, not fear. We have to unlearn the lessons that contradict our true nature, the nature God put in us. If you find yourself in a situation and your reaction to that situation is fear, you are contradicting your true nature. You are contradicting God’s nature.

 I’m not saying walk down the worst streets of Richmond just because you have to prove there is nothing to fear. Of course use common sense, be cautious, and don’t take reckless chances, but if God calls you to work, for example, in a high security prison, like our brother Ray is doing this weekend, then go and do what you are called to do, without fear. If God calls you to do something, you should not fear it. You should embrace it and know God has reasons why you are chosen and God will be with you. But there is no need for fear. The Bible is full of examples of men and women who had fear, Isaiah, Jonah, Elijah, Moses, Aaron, Peter, the women at the tomb, and the list goes on and on. And we recognize the names I mentioned because each one went against their fear and did great things for God. They just had to get over their fear.

I want to read two passages from the New Testament, first from Hebrews. “Long ago God spoke to our ancestors in many and various ways by the prophets, but in these last days he has spoken to us by a Son, whom he appointed heir of all things, through whom he also created the worlds. He is the reflection of God’s glory and the exact imprint of God’s very being (emphasis mine), and he sustains all things by his powerful word.”

The second passage is from Romans that Shirley read this morning. “For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters.”

The Hebrews passage tells us that Jesus is “the exact imprint of God’s very being.” And in Romans, Paul tells us that those who have faith in Jesus (Christians) are “to be conformed to the image of God’s son.” So let’s spell that out. We who have faith in Jesus are to be conformed to be like Jesus, who is the exact imprint of God’s very being. In other words, we, as Christians are being conformed to God’s very being. How powerful is that? We are to be ever moving to be more and more like God’s very being.

Here’s a couple of questions for you. Do you think anything is impossible for God? I’ll go out on a limb and say we answered, “No.” So, if we are to be conformed to God’s very being, should anything be impossible for us? Of course not! So why are we not acting like a child of God? Like an image of God? We are the embodiment of Jesus’ character, who is an exact imprint of God’s very being. We should be loving other people with unconditional love, without fear, without hesitation. There is nothing that should ever hold us back from accomplishing what God has called us to do.

John writes, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear;” So if we love people unconditionally, how can we have fear of them? You cannot love what you fear. If you fear people or a particular group of people, you cannot love them. None of us will want to admit this, but we all have people that we fear, perhaps it’s a particular group of people, or maybe an individual. But if we fear them, how can we love them? Let me clarify something, there is a difference between fear “of them” and fear of “what they may do.” I am not an advocate of placing yourself in danger to love someone.

Here’s something else to consider. When you meet someone, talk to them, or whatever the situation might be, how do you view that other person? For example, I’ve been going on about having part of God’s spirit in us, being created in God’s image. Do you ever consider that the person you are looking at or speaking with was ALSO created in God’s image. They ALSO have a piece of God’s spirit in them. What did Jesus say? “Whatever you did to one of the least of these, you did it to me.” If you love God, you HAVE to love other people, no matter who they might be. Because you cannot hate someone who is created in God’s image and also love God at the same time. IT CANNOT BE DONE!

What is the mission of this congregation? Let me read that for you, “Seeking to be God’s voice and hands of love, we continue the work of Jesus, peacefully, simply, together.” I don’t see where it says, “in fear.” It says, “we seek to be God’s voice and hands of love!”

Back to the Romans passage Shirley read, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.” WE are glorified by God! And another thing we should remember, we are brothers and sisters of Jesus. We share in his kingdom AND in his resurrection. We are part of a family with God as our Father and Jesus as our brother! It doesn’t get better than that!

Going on, “What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?” I had to let that one sink in a little, “If God is for us, who can be against us?”

Why do we get so hung up on little things that don’t matter? When something negative happens, we focus on it and dwell on it and make our life revolve around it. If negative people try to tell us to give up on God’s calling for our life, we let them slow us down, or stop, or even reverse course. Paul is telling us, “If God is for us, who can be against us?” The answer is “no one!” If we focus on God and our calling to do His will, there is nothing short of death to stop us. It’s when we forget who we are, and whose we are that we get into trouble.

So what does all this mean to us?

We are created in the image of God.

Part of God’s spirit is within us.

Because of that, we also have the attributes of God in our nature, and should live accordingly.

We do not have a spirit of fear.

We have a spirit of power and love and self-discipline.

So I challenge you, when you face fear, remember that God has equipped you through our very existence as human beings, to live as children of God, not in fear, but in power.

And always remember that when God is with us, who can be against us?

(What follows is something I felt the the Spirit was telling me to share that morning. I don’t know why, but when God speaks, I listen. As it turns out, many were moved by it and shared stories of their own with me. Not only were THEY encouraged, but so was I.)

Has anyone here ever witnessed a miracle?

I’m not talking about the miracle of childbirth or any of the ordinary, everyday things we call miracles. Sometimes I think we actually cheapen the word “miracle” because we call everything a miracle. Like the sun rising in the morning is a “miracle.” Science can easily explain what is happening. What I’m talking about is something that happens that cannot be explained by science. Someone who’s body is riddled with cancer and then suddenly they are healed and there is not a trace of disease in their body. It cannot be explained by science.

These things are sometimes reported, but we quickly dismiss them and think it’s a hoax. Or that can’t be true because it defies science. My personal belief is that miracles defy science and that’s why they get called “miracles.”

There’s a story of a church in a drought area that every Sunday and Wednesday they would gather and pray for rain. They prayed week after week, month after month, but no rain. One day a little girl came to church with her parents. She had with her, an umbrella. Everyone looked at her and just kind of shrugged it off. Well, during their morning prayer, it began to rain. They people of the church were exclaiming, “I don’t believe it!” and “unbelievable, God has answered our prayers!” The pastor gathered the congregation back together and talked about what was happening. He explained, we have been praying for rain, but it never rained. Today it did because this little girl brought an umbrella. She is the only one who actually believed that God was going to answer our prayers. If you had believed, you would have also brought an umbrella because you would have had faith that God could do it. Not having an umbrella is evidence of your lack of faith.

I have rarely talked about this, but I am such a witness. THAT’s why I am so passionate about my faith and why nothing can shake me from believing in what I’m talking about.

I have only shared this story with a couple of people over the past 30 years. The reason for that, is fear. Fear that I would be seen as a nut-case, or some religious fanatic with thoughts of grandeur. But this morning as I brushed my teeth, I believe the Spirit was leading me to share it. To stop with this constant fear of what other people think. If you want to see me as a fanatic or nut case, you are welcome to do that, but I believe today may be the day that I was meant to share it.

Back in my early 20s, I was having bouts with tonsillitis. Now, I get tonsillitis like a child, complete with puss filled blisters and raw skin. Not to be gross, but it is what it is. I had a dozen or so recurrences of it over a two year period. Finally, I was told by the doctor, if I have one more occurrence, my tonsils had to come out. Well, I did get it again. I was standing in front of the bathroom mirror looking at my throat with a flashlight, knowing that my tonsils were going to have to come out. I was scared. I knew (or at least thought) that to have them removed as an adult can be not only an ordeal, but can be very dangerous. So while I stood there, I prayed that I would be healed. And a thought jumped into my head. Jesus taught us that we had the power to speak to an object and command it to move, and it would be moved. His demonstration was to speak to a fig tree and commanded that it bear no more fruit. The next day the fig tree was completely dried up and dead. Jesus said, we all have the power to do that, provided when we speak, we have faith that God would carry out our desire. We are to have no doubt about what we want. Be clear about what you want.

So I spoke to the disease in my throat. I commanded it to be gone. Somehow I knew, that the disease was gone and had complete faith what I wanted was already given to me.

Suddenly, I was overcome with extreme thirst and sleepiness. I could barely keep my eyes open. So I drank 2 glasses of water and went to bed. I slept for 12 hours. When I woke up, I went back to the bathroom and checked out my throat. The blisters were gone. The soreness was gone. There was not a shred of evidence of ever having the tonsillitis. That’s why I am convinced about what I am speaking on today. There is no doubt in my mind that we have the power Jesus promised us. When we start to live as true believers, the miracles within this church will begin to flow. We will change lives and see things we are going to have a hard time believing. But our faith is the key to change. Do we believe that God can turn our church around and create growth? Do we believe that God can increase our revenue, so that rather than shrinking our budget to meet current giving, we’ll have to expand it to accommodate our mission?

When we are faithful with small things, God will trust us with bigger things. That’s what Jesus told us, but do we believe that?

Discrimination in the Workplace - My thoughts

Before I get into my thoughts, I need to state my struggle on this issue. I do not write this article for the sake of creating controversy. I write it because I struggle with the paradox that has been created in our society over discrimination of certain groups. I struggle with how laws are carried out and what is the proper way to handle different ethical dilemmas. I am asking for thoughts on the issues. I am not stating where I stand on any of the controversies I am presenting. I am just stating that there is an inconsistency as to how they are handled and I seek clarity.

The issue at hand is discrimination against different groups. Just so you know where I am coming from, all my thoughts have been stirred over the “Duck Dynasty” controversy. In case your head has been buried in the sand, this is what happened (in a nutshell): A popular TV show called “Duck Dynasty” is all about a family that became wealthy by selling duck calls. It just so happens to currently be the most popular reality show on television and is aired on the A&E Network. The patriarch of the family, Phil Robertson, was interviewed by GQ Magazine. He expressed his views of homosexuality, which angered many people in the LGBT community and its supporters. His view was a very literal reading of a passage from 1^st Corinthians in the Bible, particularly that homosexuality is a sin. He also used very “colorful” language to express his views. The homosexual advocacy group, GLAAD, called for A&E to respond to the remarks and Phil Robertson was suspended from the show “indefinitely.” To this, GLAAD praised the network for its swift action. A&E said that Phil Robertson’s remarks in no way reflected the networks beliefs, that they are, and always have been, supporters and advocates of the LGBT community. That is pretty much the scenario of what got the wheels turning in my head.

Here’s what is bothering me. A&E basically “fired” someone because his value system did not agree with their own. There was a fear, on the part of A&E, that insulting the LGBT community was going to somehow adversely affect their network. This may be a very real concern. I am not going to dispute that. But it raised a few questions for me, such as under what conditions does the network have the right to fire someone? If Phil Robertson’s values are in conflict with his employer, does the employer have the right to fire him? If his views would reduce viewership, essentially causing a loss in profit to the network, do they have the right to fire him? If his views have outraged a particular group within society, do they have a right to fire him? These are the questions I’m wrestling with.

Let’s look at the first question. If Phil Robertson’s values are in conflict with his employer, does the employer have the right to fire him? A&E and GLAAD seem to be saying that they definitely have the right in this case. Phil did not hold back his opinions on homosexuality. It was clearly not in agreement with A&E’s value system. He was “suspended indefinitely.” So let’s look at it this way. I own a business. I believe that homosexuality is morally wrong. I hire a salesman who I find out later is openly gay, do I have the right to fire him? First of all, it is illegal to ask him during the interview his sexual preference, so I was not given this information before I decided to hire him. His lifestyle completely violates my value system, so according to A&E and GLAAD, based on their previous statements concerning Phil Robertson, I should be able to fire him. This employee is completely in conflict with my value system, as Phil was in conflict with A&E’s value system. In case you are wondering, I purposely chose this scenario because it reverses the roles of the employer/employee. I thought it was obvious, but I just wanted to be clear.

Moving on, let’s look at the second question. A&E is a business. Their product is entertainment. If his views would reduce viewership, essentially causing a loss in profit to the network, do they have the right to fire him? The sole purpose of a business in a capitalistic society is to make a profit, so if his views cause a loss in profits, can he then be fired? I found this one thought provoking. I actually wrote a paper on this in my Business Ethics class 8 years ago. My topic was “it is found out that I have an employee with AIDS preparing food, what do I do?” So here’s the situation: I own a restaurant. I hire someone in food preparation who has AIDS. Now I know that AIDS cannot be transmitted through the handling of food. However, the general public is not so well informed. They see this situation as a possible “risk” to their own well being and let me know that they will not patronize my establishment because of it. Do I have the right to fire this person in order to protect my business? As I stated, there is no health risk to my customers, but those same customers have a fear, based in ignorance perhaps, but never the less, it is still a fear. Is it discrimination because it’s based in public opinion and not fact? What if we go back to the first scenario of having a gay salesman. If my customers say they won’t do business with someone gay (perhaps I do business with churches who have a strong stand against homosexuality), do I have the right to fire him because it is bad for my business?

Let’s move on to question # 3. If my employee’s views have outraged a particular group within society, do I have a right to fire him? Let’s say I hire someone who I later find out is racist and is quite vocal about it. Is that grounds to fire him? Obviously, this will go back to the previous situations of disagreeing with my value system and customers not doing business with me because of his views, but going one step further, what if he outrages the African American community? Can I fire him for that? What if the majority of my customer base is white and no one is really offended by his views because he doesn’t mention them in the company of whites? But on his own time, he is blatantly racist? Is there some basis for firing him in this case?

In my quest for answers to the above dilemmas, I found that the federal website, www.eeoc.gov, says this about the Civil Rights Act, “These laws prohibit discrimination based on race, color, sex, religion, national origin, age, disability, and genetic information.” So I have to ask, did A&E violate the law when they “suspended” Phil Robertson “indefinitely?” His values stem from his Christian beliefs, so isn’t that discrimination based on religion? The Civil Rights Act clearly defines that as one of the reasons a person cannot be fired.

As I stated in the beginning, I am not saying what is right and what is wrong, I am simply seeking answers to the questions I posed. I will also claim here that I do not endorse discrimination of any sort. I’m just a regular guy asking questions that I believe many others struggle with. If I own a business, what are my rights in the pursuit of maximizing my profits? Do our laws help or hinder me in ethical situations? What can I do to protect my business from all the different advocacy groups that may disagree with my business practices? Do I have rights that outweigh the rights of those seeking employment with me? If I had all the answers to these questions, I would not be putting it out there for others to read. So please feel free to tell me what you think.

Are Jesus and Santa White - My thoughts

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/on-faith/wp/2013/12/13/its-wrong-to-worship-white-jesus/

I am going to address the article that I posted in the link above, but first I want to give you some background of my own theology.

When you try to describe God, what words do you use? Well, obviously, you have to use words from a human language, in my case English. The problem is, our words are best to describe the physical world. God is spirit. God is not a physical being. So if someone asks you to describe God, how would you do it so that they can understand it? Children think in concrete terms, so we have to give a concrete answer. We, in our finite minds, cannot accurately describe God because we are not capable of describing God, even to an adult. We can describe the physical realm from the vastness of the universe, all the way down to the quantum level, but we can’t describe God, because God is too big for our little minds to fully grasp. We have abstract words we can use, like “love”. So we say, “God is love.” I totally agree. But now describe “love”. We can’t do it, it’s not physical. But, we can experience it. Once we experience love, we can say “God is love” and have an idea of what that actually means. But to do it with words, I don’t think so.

Let me go yet another step into how we describe what we don’t have words for, using a great example from the Bible. If we look at the book of Revelation, John was transported to heaven and was told to write down what he saw. Ok, first problem, John experiences images, visions, and feelings that no actual words can describe. So my first question is, how can he write it down? The answer: "the best that he can." If we look at John’s descriptions of what he saw, he uses words that describe the physical world he was familiar with. His own words at one point are “And I saw what looked like a sea of glass glowing with fire. (Rev 15:2)” I paraphrase that to say, “I saw something beyond words and it was sort of like this…, but not really.” He tried to describe it with the only words he had. Some people describe abstract ideas, like emotions, as colors, or textures, or something that relates to our five senses. When I feel “love”, it is “warm”. The person who says that sort of thing relates being warm as a pleasurable experience. Love induces a “pleasurable” feeling, so describing it as “warm” makes a whole lot of sense. John saw heaven, something no one else has ever seen. It was too wonderful for words, so how can he possibly describe it? In terms of his five senses is the only way he can. Look at the English language. All our words work well with the physical world. We have “abstract” words to describe “ideas”, but when trying to accurately define those words, it’s very difficult to fully do so. Only people with common experiences can fully understand someone trying to describe that same experience. If you have never experienced falling in love, you will never actually understand someone’s description of it. I maintain that it cannot be done.

As children, our first concept of God is that He is like our parents or guardians. So if we had good, loving parents, we see God as a loving God. If our parents were harsh, we see God as a punishing God. As children, we understand God to be like those who have authority over us. My first concept of God was that of my grandmother. She would hold 4 of us at a time (myself and my brothers or cousins) on her lap in her rocking chair and sing to us. Whenever I thought about God, I pictured that scene and felt safe and loved. THAT was my concept of God. For those who started with bad experiences of what God was like, will often find it hard to see God as "good" as they mature. On a side note, we need to bring those who do not believe in Christ as the Son of God to that belief. As Christians, we need to be a reflection of God so that others can see what God is really like. When we condemn others, or refuse to help people, or anything that is not God-like, or something Jesus would not do, we project an image of God that is not true to His character. As “light to the world”, people need to see God in us, so that they might come to God and become part of His kingdom. We should “overcome” their old concepts of God with our love for each other and our care for the lost. Help them get passed their old ideas of God, and reveal the truth to them.

Now on to the article: The first line in this article says, “when someone insists that Jesus was ‘white,’ the theological implication is that God is white.” I have a hard time with this statement. First of all, if someone insists that Jesus is white, they have no frame of reference as far as history goes and are quite ignorant of the facts. Jesus was a Jew in the Middle East. As far as I’m concerned (looking from just a logical point of view), and I’m no expert, I will go with Jesus, in human form, had the complexion of someone from our modern day Middle East. I might not be totally accurate, but I’m guessing it’s pretty close. Second, I don’t see how Jesus being white infers that God is also white. God is not a physical being, so color is not part of his makeup. Just like God is neither male nor female. He is described, in the Bible, as being “our father” (a male description) because in the day it was written, fathers were responsible for caring for all those in their charge. God is responsible for caring for us, so again, going back to our ideas about how we describe God is directly related to our own experience, or in this case, the experiences of the writers. Describing God as female, at the time the books of the Bible were written, would not portray God in the best light, because it was a patriarchal society and women were not thought of very highly. So it makes total sense to describe God as a “father.”

Now after saying all this, I have to say, “if it is important to you that Jesus be a certain color, then you have completely missed the boat when it comes to the Christian faith.” How does the color of Jesus’ skin change any part of your faith? Either he was the son of God, or he wasn’t. The amount of melanin in his skin is irrelevant. If you are black and Jesus being white somehow hurts your faith, then you have the wrong faith. Also, if you are white and Jesus being black causes a problem for you, you better check your faith at the door because it’s not a Christian faith you are professing. Jesus came to Earth for one simple reason, to save humankind from their sins, to pay the price FOR us, because we are incapable of doing it for ourselves. He IS God and died on a cross to be the final sacrifice for the sins of the world, not for the sins of whites or blacks or any group you might name, but the whole world, which includes everybody.

A little more on my personal theology: I believe the Bible is the inspired word of God. But I also believe that the writers who did the actual writing wrote within their experience and that’s why the “flavors” of the books of the Bible are so different. I don’t believe the Bible was dictated by God, word for word, to the writers. I believe they were inspired with the message of the Spirit and wrote it down, being true to their own style, personality and experience.

Next line in the article is “doesn’t God, in our cultural stereotype, look a lot like Santa? An old white man with a long white beard?” OK, I got another problem here. God doesn’t look a lot like Santa, Santa looks a lot like our concept of God. This was the line that told me the writer of the article doesn’t get the Christian faith, yet she is a former president of Chicago Theological Seminary! I believe our concept of God’s physical appearance is partially due to different artist’s renderings, like Michelangelo's painting on the Sistine Chapel ceiling. We have a human need to visualize God so badly that we are willing to believe other people’s ideas to be the truth, instead of thinking for ourselves. And even when we think for ourselves, we picture God in our own terms. Remember my personal concept of God? It’s my grandmother, holding me and my brothers or cousins on her lap, singing songs to us, making us feel safe and loved. When the book of Genesis says, “We are created in God’s image”, I don’t believe that means “physically” like God, it means our “spirit” is created in the image of God’s spirit. So as far as God being an old white man with a long white beard, I think that all comes from centuries of artist’s renderings of their idea of what God would look like, all based on the book of Revelation passage of what Jesus looked like to John.

What follows is my interpretation of why we see God as the old man with the white beard. When we read John’s words from the book of Revelation, specifically verse 1:14, the coming Jesus is described as having white hair and a white beard. We don’t normally associate Jesus looking like this, but we immediately turn this vision of John’s into our idea of what God would look like. Jesus WAS God, so we thrust this vision of Jesus onto God. Why would that be? My personal take is this: Jewish men of biblical times wore beards. That’s pretty much a given. And white hair is a sure sign of wisdom as is described in Proverbs. God, being all knowing and very wise, would of course be described this way, and would also be described in “our image” as a man. We are created in God’s image, so why do we describe God, “in OUR image?” That is probably the heart of this whole discussion. I once again go back to my own concept of God. My experience of unconditional love given to me by my grandmother, is my same experience of God. Had I not known that unconditional love in human form, how can I understand the unconditional love of God? I’m not saying it is impossible, because some people have come to God BECAUSE they never experienced unconditional love from anyone in their own lives. But I will contend that if you don’t experience it from another human being, it would be very difficult to experience it in the form of a spirit. How many people do you know that came to God without the aid of someone within the family God? I cannot think of anyone personally. If you walk into a church building, and no one welcomes you, or offers you hospitality, or extends a hand of friendship, are you going to experience God’s love within that building? Probably not. I believe that God is seen “in” us and that is how He is revealed to others. If we don’t “show” God’s love to others, they are not able to know God’s love. Yes, God loves those who have not experienced His love, but human contact is the medium God uses to show His love to others.

“Jesus and Santa are enormously powerful images for Americans.” This statement from the article gives me chills. I totally agree with it, but I also see this as a very dangerous road the author is revealing. Equating Jesus with Santa being on the same level is actually the kind of thinking that is destroying the faith of Christians. I have to ask anyone reading this, “As a Christian, is it OK to teach children that an all knowing man, who watches them as they sleep, who knows everything they do, even exists?” When I was growing up, I remember the period of time immediately following my parent’s announcement to me that Santa Claus was not real. I was the second oldest and was told this, by my mom, in the privacy of my parent’s bedroom, with the door shut, so my younger brothers did not hear. I was also sworn to secrecy not to mention it to my younger brothers. A day or two later, it occurred to me, “What about the Easter Bunny? Or the Tooth Fairy? How about anything my parents ever told me my whole life?” I was devastated! That was the first time it ever occurred to me that my parents had lied to me. Up to that point, I never questioned anything they ever said, so now I began questioning everything that ever came out of my parent’s mouths, past, present and future. Some say I’m overreacting, that it’s not that big of a deal. For a child who never doubted anything his parent’s told him, it was a HUGE deal! The next time we went to church, guess what I was doubting now? I had to ask, “Have I ever seen God? Have I ever witnessed God ever doing anything? How do I know adults have not been telling me a lie that God existed? How could I trust anything or anybody older than me, when my own parents have been lying to me my whole life?”

Perhaps I did overreact, but the author of the article talks about the book, “Santa Claus Should Not Be A White Man Any More,” by Alisha Harris. She says, “Harris writes movingly about the dominant culture white Santa and its effect on her as a kid.” If I overreacted, does it not stand to reason that Alisha Harris ALSO overreacted? The author of the article seems to think Ms. Harris is making a valid point because she is black and Santa was considered white, causing a huge conflict for her. How is the magnitude of conflict different from my experience of finding out that adults lie to children? Who actually has the bigger conflict going on?

The remainder of the article is based on the assumption that white people see God as white and how that concept is used to maintain racial superiority over others. That may be true, but why do we argue that we should change the idea of Santa being white to something else? Perhaps the better solution is for Christians to stop teaching their children that Santa exists at all! Let’s ask a few basic questions. As a Christian, how do you justify telling your children a lie? You know that lying is a sin, correct? And misleading a child, Jesus taught, is a huge deal. So why do you think it’s ok to do that? It is culturally accepted to tell this lie, so does that make it right? If your child does not believe in Santa, will he be picked on at school, making it “necessary” to lie in order to protect him or her?

When my first child was born, I told my wife, I do not want to use Santa Claus as part of our Christmas tradition. Now we had an understanding that if we wanted to change any long standing family traditions, we both had to agree to it, or else the tradition was to continue. You need to understand that both my wife and I had been raised with Santa, so in order to change that and NOT use this tradition required that both my wife and I agree to it, BECAUSE we had to go back to our families and tell them we are making a change and they weren’t going to like it. My wife declined to agree with me. So I prayed about it. I asked God to either make my wife see my point of view, or for me to see hers and accept it. Over the course of a few weeks, and as Christmas approached, we began witnessing something we never saw before. Everywhere we went, we would hear other parents saying to their children, things like, “If you don’t behave, Santa isn’t going to bring you any presents” or, “Santa can see you when you’re bad.” What my wife and I came to understand is that Santa was NOT the jolly old man we assumed he was, he was actually a disciplinary tool used to create fear in the hearts of children to force them to behave. Santa was not a fun story in the imagination of children, he was out there somewhere deciding who deserved his love, not based on grace, but based on merit. Santa loves you IF you deserve it. I can see many parents saying, “I don’t teach my child THAT sort of lesson.” Well, all I ask is that you think about the things you DO teach them. Did you ever tell your child that Santa would not bring them gifts because they were misbehaving? If the answer is “yes”, then I believe I have made my point.

In the end, we did not use Santa as part of our tradition. We told our children that they were not allowed to tell others that Santa wasn’t real. It was OUR secret and we would pretend with the other children who didn’t know the truth. My parents told me that I was robbing my children of their childhoods. I made my announcement to not use Santa on a phone call to my mom. She said that telling my children about Santa was no different than telling them about God, saying I am telling them about some invisible being that I can’t prove existed. My reply was that the difference is that God is real and Santa is not. My mother-in-law actually cried because my children would never have any fun at Christmas because I was taking away the whole point of Christmas. What we DID have, is an Advent wreath, complete with candles that we lit each day and read stories about Jesus from the Bible and taught our children WHY we celebrate Christmas. Every night, starting with the first Sunday in Advent, we would talk about Jesus and God and pray and worship them and thank them for the Christmas season. On Christmas day, we had a birthday celebration for Jesus, complete with a birthday cake. We sang happy birthday and ate cake for breakfast. We opened gifts like the “normal” families did, but we thanked each other for the gifts instead of Santa. The most fun part for my children? When people would ask, “What did Santa bring you for Christmas?” They could laugh inside that these adults, had no clue that Santa wasn’t real. THEY (my children) knew the truth, but adults were just plain silly for believing that story. The best outcome of our new found traditions? My children never thought that when we told them something, that it might be a lie. They knew without a doubt that we told them the truth about everything.

I don’t think arguing about whether Santa and Jesus are white merits any sort of news article to be written. Those of the Christian faith should be so far beyond this way of thinking that it shouldn’t even be a blip on our radar. When you are brand new to the faith, yes, it may be an issue at first, but experiencing God’s love, will wipe out this meaningless nonsense very quickly. Racial prejudice can run deep, but God’s love will conquer that in His children. Those who believe there is a difference in human beings based on skin color do not know the love of God. Being Christian by its very nature will tear down that sort of thinking. No one can love God WITHOUT loving their neighbor. So if someone professes “Jesus is white” because it is “culturally acceptable” to believe that, they are not professing any sort of Christian belief that I am familiar with. So if it offends you when others believe Jesus and Santa are white, perhaps you need to take inventory of your own beliefs. Because when we stand in God’s love, what others believe cannot hurt us.

How to Punish Children - my thoughts

http://www.jennifermcgrail.com/2013/11/how-and-why-i-opted-out-of-being-the-meanest-mom-in-the-world/

This was a great article on teaching correct behaviors to children. But I have to ask, “How should you ‘modify’ or ‘punish’ certain behaviors?” You can teach good behavior, but kids see other kids doing bad behavior and learn that too. I am always impressed with teaching "correct" behavior by example, but what do you do when the kids are practicing a "destructive" or "unacceptable" behavior?

When my children first learned to "lie" in order to hide something they did, I was taken completely off guard. The first couple of times, they actually got away with it, because I never saw it coming. They lied and I believed them because up to that point, they had always been truthful. However, when I actually caught them lying for the very first time, I had to figure out how to make them realize it was not a good practice to follow. So here's what my wife and I did:

We gave them a choice. I explained to them that what they just said to me was not the truth. "You said this, but I know that you did this. So I'm going to ask again. If you say this (the lie) I will smack your butt. If you say this (the truth) there is no punishment and we will fix whatever it was that you did." The first time each of my children were faced with this choice, they once again told the lie (different occasions, but the same reaction from both). So when they stuck to their lie, I smacked their butts. The next time my oldest told a lie, she immediately started crying and said, "I want to tell the truth!" So I allowed her to tell me again, and I hugged her and we fixed whatever it was she did.

However, my youngest was stubborn about it. At that time, we had a VCR (remember those?) and there was an issue with the children sticking things in the deck where the tape goes. So we told them, “Don’t do that.” It’s a very simple instruction and they understood. However, on one occasion, I got out of bed in the morning to find my youngest with her hand stuck in the deck. The door flap had trapped her hand. So I very calmly said to her, "did you put your hand in the VCR?" (Remember that her hand is actually stuck in it and she can’t get it out.) She looks me right in the eye and says, "No." I remind her that if she tells me the lie again, I will smack her butt, but if she tells the truth, I will not do that and we will fix the problem. So I ask again, "did you stick your hand in the VCR?" Again, she says, "No". So I smack her butt. I also leave her there with her hand in the VCR and turn to the other child and say, "let's go get some breakfast." Well, the younger one actually figured out how to get her hand out and proceeded to the kitchen for breakfast, but I don't mention it again.

She continued for 6 months sticking to her lies whenever she was faced with the choice of "lying and getting her butt smacked" vs. "telling the truth". But after 6 months of getting her butt smacked each and every time, she finally figured out that I was not going to ever let her get away with lying. So eventually she began choosing to tell the truth to avoid the punishment. She figured out that there was absolutely no gain in telling a lie, and she had my complete support in fixing whatever she had done to make it right. Both kids were also very quick to point out that they were “choosing” to tell the truth when they did, so the whole idea that telling the truth is a choice got through to them.

Many parents I know would fly off the handle to correct the problem of lying as soon as possible. I agree that lying is totally unacceptable. I have also been questioned as to why we don’t just punish them and let them figure out that lying is wrong. Why give them the choice of rethinking their options? They lied, so they deserve punishment. I agree, except for one thing, on the first offense, did they know that lying was wrong? I think most kids lie for the first time “accidentally”. They did something that is going to bring on punishment, so to avoid what they know is coming, they lie. It was nothing more than a defense mechanism, but it worked, so they learn to use it as a way to avoid other punishments. We don’t teach our kids NOT to lie until AFTER they do it for the first time. So the first time they do it, they actually did not know it was wrong. How can you punish a behavior that the child never knew he/she was not supposed to do? So giving options is a good way to let them make a choice HOW they want to proceed. Also, remember that my kids learned that they were making a conscious choice to tell the truth. Swift punishment for the offense will get them to make the choice to be truthful out of fear, not out of doing what is right. Both are learned responses, but which one teaches correct behavior out of a sense of doing right as opposed to doing what’s right for my own sake?

I see life as nothing but a series of choices. All choices have consequences, good or bad. So let’s ask ourselves a few questions. First of all, what is it that a child is lying about? A child lies when they have done something they are afraid to admit to. As a matter of fact, adults lie for the same reason. So, if they broke your prized knick-knack that you told them not to touch, they are reacting to the punishment you are going to hand out to the culprit who broke it. They are in complete fear of receiving the punishment for what they did. So to avoid that punishment, they lie as a protective reaction. In the case of breaking your knick-knack, they have two choices. They can lie or they can tell the truth. If they lie, and you believe the lie, they avoid the punishment for playing with it in the first place. If they tell the truth, do you hand out punishment for breaking it? Probably, so there is a reward for lying, if it works. If, on the other hand, they tell the truth, they are guaranteed to receive the punishment for the action of breaking it, so they are punished for telling the truth. Faced with these two choices, which would you choose? Personally, I would go with the lie. Again, if it works, I avoid all punishment. If it fails, I get punished. On the other hand, if I tell the truth, I am guaranteed punishment. Now, I’m a pretty smart guy, so I’m going to go with the option that gives me the best chance of avoiding punishment all together, which is lying.

When my children were given the option to tell the truth, that option included “my help in fixing whatever they did”. So their actual choices were, “tell the truth and avoid ALL punishment AND correct whatever happened” or “tell the lie and get punished for lying”. Of course, part of “getting my help in fixing whatever they did” came with a conversation on why whatever they did was wrong and how they should never do it again. I found my children were very open to listening to this whole conversation BECAUSE they did not receive the punishment. I think when we punish them for breaking the knick-knack AND punish them for lying, the fear of the whole situation closes them off to hearing any message we are trying to give them. If we want them to learn from their mistakes, we need them to be receptive to our teaching. My message to my children is that when you are truthful, you have a chance to make things right. I will always be there for you, helping you, but we need to be honest with one another. If they do the right thing, they have my full support. If they do something wrong, I will be there to help them fix it. Just to be clear, “fixing it” may include restitution to the wronged party, or suffering the consequences for their actions. Telling the truth is always a priority, along with taking responsibility for your actions.

Another thing about handing out punishment, I don’t believe in punishing my child WHILE I’m upset and not thinking clearly. If I punish my child out of anger, I actually consider that as a form of abuse. Of course I’m human so I get angry sometimes and want to smack them into next week, but I cannot teach my child correct behavior if I am only reacting to what they did. I need to be able to express my disappointment in them so they understand why they are being punished, why what they did was wrong, why I don’t want to punish them, but have to. Now, if they are playing around a hot stove, I react quickly. That is not the time to “explain” the dangers of a hot stove. First, they must be made safe, THEN explanation of why I reacted the way I did needs to be made. Reaction is necessary in many situations, but wrong behavior should be met with calm discipline. And of course, the discipline can be severe, depending on the behavior that needs to be corrected. I made it a point to say, “This is what you did, and this is what I need to do because of it.” In the case where they do something they don’t know is wrong, I don’t think that case should be met with punishment. If they break something that I never told them they couldn’t touch, how can that be met with punishment? I never said, “Don’t touch it” so how do they know it was wrong? If, on the other hand, I DID tell them not to touch it and they do it anyway, NOW I have a reason to hand down some discipline.

As I see it, I am not raising “children,” I am raising “future adults”. I can force them to tell the truth by giving out severe punishment for lying. I don’t have to give them the choice of telling the truth or receiving punishment. I can make punishment swift and effective and probably get a very obedient child. However, when they grow up, what lesson did they actually learn? They learned that if you lie and get away with it, there are no consequences. There are only consequences in getting caught. My children learned that telling the truth makes life better. They actually get the option to help those they wronged. If they lie and feel guilty about it later, they need to go back and admit that not only did they do something wrong, but they also lied to cover it up. Which is easier, telling the truth about what you did, or telling the truth about what you did AND that you lied on top of that? The first choice avoids the guilt and stress we put on ourselves. If we lie and don’t confess it because it is too hard to do, we may have the guilt and related stress for the rest of our lives.

Note - The following paragraphs were not part of my original post. I am adding them because the first few reactions to the original article had to do with spanking as a punishment being wrong. The readers totally missed the point of the methodology we used to discipline our kids because they got caught up in the form of punishment we chose. What I need to say is this, spanking in our household was extremely rare. The example I used above did carry spanking as the form of punishment used, but this form of punishment was used ONLY for a "severe" violation of acceptable behavior. To us, lying is one of these "severe" cases. The majority of times when discipline was necessary, it was in other forms, for example, a "timeout." For one child, isolation was very effective. When she misbehaved, we sent her to her room. With her personality, she "needed" to be with people. So for her, being alone was one of the worst things we could do. For the other child, being sent to her room was like heaven. She LOVED to be alone, so sending her to her room was not a punishment at all. So for her, we made her sit in a corner and watch the rest of us have fun. If necessary, we would get out a game and make her watch us have fun.

Second, I made the point of never passing out punishment while angry. In the case of spanking, if you strike the child in anger, you are doing nothing but teaching that reacting with violence is ok. That is a very bad example to teach. In the case I stated above, the spanking was an "option" that the children could choose. If they chose to lie to us, then the spanking would follow. They were told exactly that. They were given the choice of what they wanted to do, tell the truth and receive no punishment, or continue to lie and get the butt smacked. It was known ahead of time, so it was never an act of violence, it was what they chose to make happen. Also, it was a single whack to the butt, NOT a beating. It was firm and meaningful, but not abusive.

In my thinking, the form of punishment should be entirely designed for the child's personality. For me, as a child, I required only a stern look to be corrected. My brothers however, needed some physical correction. I believe spanking can be an excellent tool if used correctly and sparingly. If the child is spanked for every type of offense, its value as an effective tool is lost. In an overall, thought out plan of how to discipline your child, spanking can be quite handy. Too many parents do not take the time to figure out (ahead of time) how to discipline their children. If you figure out how you will handle the discipline before it's required, you can be far more effective in the long run. We all know that our children are going to need it, so think about it before you are forced into reacting to it. Proactive parenting is far superior to reactive parenting.